Dignity and a difficult decision

Feb 4 2010 By Jane Harrison, Ealing Gazette

ONE of the hardest things you have to do when faced with a terminal illness is deciding where to spend the last days of your life.

Gone are the days when the only choice was a hospital bed. Now you have real options: a hospice, a nursing home and even your own home, surrounded by those you love.

Step in Rebecca Allkins, a newly-appointed Marie Curie discharge liaison nurse, whose speciality is helping patients and families decide the best place to be, with vital practical and emotional back-up to support them in those last months or days.

Rebecca, 29, based at Ealing hospital, said: "A high number of people die in hospital and they don't need to. There is much more national focus now on 'end of life' care and we want to make sure people are where they want to be. I can arrange the right equipment and care packages like social services, district nurse, carers four times a day, whatever is needed. Lots of things are possible."

A former intensive care nurse who has worked with the charity for four years, Rebecca said dealing with this ultimate decision was rarely easy, although the view of hospices has changed over the years.

She said: "People see them as specialist centres. As long as the family has accepted what is going on they see it as the best place for their loved ones to be. Most of my referrals are to hospices.

"Some people are in denial, but most have accepted the situation. Sometimes patients say 'I know I am dying. This is what has to happen'.

"Yes, sometimes there are tears and there's nothing you can say to make it better other than being there and supporting them." * If you would like to make a donation to our campaign, log on to www.mariecurie.org.uk/ealing